WEDDING

We look into some differences between the western and Chinese culture by comparing their wedding ceremony.

1. Introduction

Now as globalization is the tendency of the world, the relationship between different countries gets closer. The western culture comes into our sight. Under this condition, we have more opportunities of communicating with foreigners. This kind of communication leads to the prosperity of culture. But at the same time, the differences between western and Chinese culture get more and more clear, which have great influences. We need to know the culture and the differences clear so that it’s possible for us to avoid the unnecessary conflicts.

2 The Wedding Ceremony in Western Countries

2.1 The Unchanged Process of the Wedding Ceremony

Most weddings follow long-held traditions. The couple may invite hundreds of people or just a few close friends. The bride usually wears a beautiful, long

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white wedding dress. She traditionally wears \"something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue.\" The groom wears a formal suit or tuxedo. Several close friends participate in the ceremony as attendants, including the best man and the maid of honor.

As the ceremony begins, the groom and his groomsmen stand with the minister, facing the audience. Music signals the entrance of the bridesmaids, followed by the beautiful bride. Nervously, the young couple repeats their vows. Traditionally, they promise to love each other \"for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health.\" But sometimes the couple has composed their own vows. They give each other a gold ring to symbolize their marriage commitment. Finally the minister announces the big moment: \"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride!\"

At the wedding reception, the bride and groom greet their guests. Then they cut the wedding cake and feed each other a bite. Guests mingle while enjoying cake, punch and other treats (Usually at a reception a dinner is served). Later the bride throws her bouquet of flowers to a group of single girls. Tradition says that the one who catches the bouquet will be the next to marry. During the reception, playful friends \"decorate\" the couple's car with tissue paper, tin cans and a \"Just Married\" sign. When the reception is over, the newlyweds run to their \"decorated\" car and speed off. Many couples take a honeymoon, a one- to two-week vacation trip, to celebrate their new marriage.

2.2 Changes of Some Steps in the Wedding Ceremony

2.2.1 The Change of the Wedding Dress

The \"traditional\" white wedding dress, moreover, is a recent innovation. It did not become popular until about the early 19th century. Its popularity may be due less to its association with virginity than to a showoff of one's privilege. Before the Victorian times, the brides can wear different colors of wedding

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dressing except the black and the red ones. Most Victorian brides wore traditional national costumes. The white dress, an impractical innovation, became popular among the upper classes precisely because of its defects: Victorian brides from privileged backgrounds wore white to indicate that they were rich enough to wear a dress for one day only. Later, the white wedding dress also became popular among brides from somewhat less privileged backgrounds. With the development of the society, there appeared different colors of wedding dress such as the pink, light blue, ivory and so on. At the same time, there are more and more decorations on the wedding dress. The most important point is the color of the wedding dress should suit the skin of the bride.

2.2.2 The Change of the Music in the Wedding Ceremony

The music on the wedding day has been divided into three parts: the prelude, the wedding march and the exit music. Most people in western country will choose some classical music on their wedding day. Such as Mendelssohn` s Wedding March，Pachelbel` s Canon in D，Handel` s Arrival of the Queen of Sheba and so on. But now, most young people would like to choose some popular song such as Johnny Cash` s Walk the Line，Elvis Presley` s It's Now or Never，Robbie Williams` s Angel and so on.

2.3 Wedding Ceremony in Some Western Countries

2.3.1 Wedding Ceremony in France

For French romantic wedding white is the main color. The layout of flowers, the bride’s dress, and even the layout of all decorations are white. We can see that in the eyes of the French people marriage should be pure. At the wedding, the bride will be prepared to hand sophisticated, pictorial symbol of health and

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prosperity in the cupboard for dowry, so the cupboard is called the “hope kit”. The new selection of the cup also has a specific name, called “Wedding of the Cup”. And these are the characteristics of French wedding.

2.3.2 Wedding Ceremony in England

In the traditional British-style wedding, the bride will be holding the Zantedeschia symbol of good luck. If new people living in the neighboring church, and the ceremony guests will have to walk into the church and sprinkled in the way the orange flowers. Most British weddings are held at noon, and then the host will arrange the luncheon meeting, known as the wedding meal. The British-style wedding cake, made by a large number of fruit and decorated with broken peach kernel, the top of which is called christening cake , will be retained until the first baby was born.

3. Main Idea: The Wedding Ceremony in China

3.1 Wedding Ceremony in Slave Society

Here we just introduce some details about the wedding ceremony in Zhou Dynasty because many procedures are alike with that of the Federal Society.

The new couple will wash their hands and faces before sitting down. The etiquette of Han nationality emphasizes the lustration very much. After greeting each other, the new couple sit face to face, bride on the right and bridegroom on the left. The couple then will have a drink with their cups connected with a red silk which symbolize that the couple will be happy forever. The ceremony of “Jie Fa” is nearly the same as that of the Federal Society. So we can ignore it here. The couple will also close their eyes and put their hand together and the emcee will say that to hold your hand and to grow old with you”

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3.2 Wedding Ceremony in Feudal Society

3.2.1 Wedding Ceremony of Minorities

Living in the vast Inner Mongolia, the Mongolians have various wedding ceremonies, of which Ordos wedding ceremony is the most wonderful. Ordos wedding ceremony has been passed down for more than 700 years and still keeps an ancient style and flavor. With distinctive ethnic features, strong flavor of life, melodious songs and dances as well as warm and grand scenes, Ordos wedding ceremony reflects the yearning quest for a better life and the rough, forthright and kindhearted nature of industrious, brave and wise Mongolians in Ordos. Therefore, Ordos wedding ceremony spreads far and wide.

Ordos wedding ceremony has its unique procedures and celebrating activities, such as getting engaged with Khatag, marrying the bride with a bow, meeting the bridegroom at the gate, offering a sheep and toasting, asking names and birth dates, cutting the sheep's neck, combing hair for marriage, Mother's blessings, scrambling for hats, baptizing with sacred water, kneeling down before the father-in-law and mother-in-law, unveiling the bride's veil, bride offering tea to parents and going back to the bride's home. These procedures and activities are different from wedding procedures of other ethnic groups and those Mongolians living in other areas.

In the suspended wooden buildings (Diaojiao Lou) of Tujia ethnic group in western Hubei Province, several interesting \"stealing customs\" have been handed down till now, such as stealing pumpkin or beam. Among it, stealing rice bowl is a unique custom of the Tujia ethnic minority group, which is called \"stealing marriage\". On the day of wedding, the procession on bridegroom's part will go up to the bride's house and go over the amusing conventions of \"blocking the door \"and \"asking for cakes\" at the door done by the bride's relatives or friends. After that, the procession will enjoy a big dinner prepared by the bride's family, during which they need to stealthily hide the rice bowls at

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their chests or under their arms and then take the \"swag\" back to the groom's home to win their rewards. The stolen bowls are called \"the bowls of wealth and happiness\and the more are stolen, the wealthier and happier the couple will be.

3.2.2 Wedding Ceremony of Han Nationality

Red is the Color of Weddings in China. The bride's wedding gown is often red, as well as the wedding invitations and wedding gift boxes. Even the bride and groom's rooms are decorated in red on the wedding day. The bride is often seen with a red veil on her head. It covers the bride's face. Chinese people call the veil, made of a laced silk square, red head cover. A large Chinese character, Double Happiness, on a red piece of paper or in paper cut is always put where it will strike the eyes on a young couple's wedding.

The main process of a wedding:

On the day of the wedding, the bridegroom may deliver the matchmaker to pick up the bride or he will pick the bride up with the matchmaker. Before entering the sedan chair, the bride may pretend to be unwilling to get married and cry. On the way to the groom’s, the companions will play different kinds of local instruments. Once the sedan chair arrives, the groom's family plays music and firecracker to welcome the sedan. The bride steps out of the sedan when the groom draws three red arrows toward the arch of the sedan. After getting out of the sedan, the bride will cross a red lacquer wooden saddle and walk on a red felt, hold by the matchmaker and then stand on the right side of the banquet hall. The groom will stand on the left side. In the couple’s hands, there is a red ribbon which connects them together. During the very important wedding ceremony, usually at the banquet, the couple bows three times: first to Heaven and Earth, then to their parents, finally to each other. Then they are really married. Then the bride is escorted to the bridal chamber. In the chamber the groom will reveal the red cover of the bride with a weighbeam. The bridegroom and the bride each

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take a glass of wine and stand facing each other. Then, with their arms intertwined, they drink which means the marriage has bonded the two tightly together. The couple will also cut a few braids of hair and bind theirs together, which is called “Jiefa”. The spree happens after the feast when the bride and groom go back into their chamber. Relatives, friends and neighbors, any one at the wedding in fact, can come in to play all kinds of tricks on the new couple, especially the bride. They make a lot of noise so that there is an extremely lively atmosphere in the room, which is believed to be an inseparable part of a jolly wedding.

3.3 Wedding Ceremony in Modern Society

The modern wedding of China mainly divided into three parts. The first and the third part of the wedding follow the western wedding style and the second part follows the traditional wedding style.

In the first part, the bridegroom arrives in the bride’s house and loots the bride from her family. Then he finds out the shoes which are hidden by the bride, and then promises to the bride’s family. The bridegroom carries the bride on his back and drives to his house, and the bride serves the bridegroom’s parents tea. Finally the couple is driven to the rummery, then the bride and bridegroom stand at the banqueting hall’s doorway to receive the guests.

The next part is the same as the western wedding, the bridegroom waits for the bride to come to the stage to give the oath. Then the bride wears the wedding dress and goes to the hall with the music of the “Wedding March”. The bride goes forward to the bridegroom with her father’s traction, and the father gives her hand to the bridegroom. The emcee read out the vow, and the couple say “Yes, I do”, then change their rings.

The third part follows the traditional wedding. The bride dresses cheong-sam and goes to the stage again. Then they make a bow to their parents and change appellation to each other’s parents, and the parents of the couple

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should give them a red envelope with money. The couple go forward to the guests and play host to them. Then the main ceremony of the wedding is over till then.

In all, we can see the modern wedding in China contains the ingredients of the western wedding style, but more apt to the traditional style. Except the transportation tools and the wedding dress, the ceremony hasn’t changed a lot.

4. The Comparison between the Western and Chinese Wedding Ceremony

Contrast on music

In the aspect of music, the two cultures have differences. In China the more noisy the music, the more blessing the new couple can get. So we always discharge firecrackers.

Churches in the western countries play the Wedding March in a soft and serene way, without any else sound when the music is on. A wedding is going on in a very religious atmosphere. Because they believe that only in the quiet and peaceful environment can the couple get the blessing from God.

Contrast on the aim

The aim of Chinese traditional marriage is to expand the family, to breed the offspring and to promote the position and reputation of the clan. A man is very careful to select his wife in order not to insult the fame of the whole family. So the marriage is considered an important matter of the family, not only a private thing between two persons. The love between the man and woman is not the first cause of the marriage. It is conducted by the parents with the help of a third person and realized through the procedure of giving presents and

welcoming. The western people have a wide attitude towards the marriage. Most of them just wish a consummate end of their love. And their marriage is not decided by the parents. A man and woman get married through amativeness. It

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is not common to see a woman is forced to marry a man that she doesn’t love. Thus compared with Chinese traditional marriage, the western wedding is more romantic and less restricted.

Contrast on the costume

The comparison in the color of dressing: there is a large difference between Chinese and western in the aspect of dressing. In the traditional wedding of China, the main color of dressing is red, which means favonian and wishes, hoping that the life after the marriage could be prosperous. But in the western countries, the dressing of bride is always white, following the canonicals of Romanist. Because of so many countries in the Europe are led by religion, people should go to the church to receive the beatitude given by abbes when they wanted to get married. So the bride often wears the white dress to show her impressments and chasteness

The reason of the differences between the Chinese and the western wedding ceremony

The way of thinking

Chinese people are a bit of conservative. They like jollification, but their ways of thinking are some kind of old-fashioned. So the wedding customs do not change so much。Until the modern western culture was transmitted into china, the traditional Chinese culture began to transfer towards the western culture. but to a large extent, there still exists some traditional wedding customs。.Chinese people` s character of loving jollification can be fully reflected on the traditional wedding ceremony.

The ethics of marriage in the western country originated from the mixture of the Grecian and Hebrew Christian culture. They are willing to be completely self-devote to each other. And their marriage which is based on their hard working surpasses any human relationship, and it cannot be divided.

The conception of the religion

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Most Chinese people believe in Buddhism, but the western people tend to believe in Christianity. So it is always the priest who hosts the wedding ceremony. On Chinese wedding ceremony, the most important part is to worship Heaven & Earth. After this, the wedding ceremony comes to its end.

5. Conclusion

In all, the difference of wedding ceremony between China and the West is mainly depended on the different background of culture and history. This kind of difference is evolved slowly by the effect of all sorts of thoughts and customs. Also in the influence of religion, all kinds of customs and habits are formed on the wedding ceremony. 参考文献

[l]蔡利民，人生礼俗丛书之中国婚礼，l几海文艺出版社，2001，1112]Jean.wat，on，神圣婚礼，同济大学电子音像出版社，2006，8t31吴忠军，扬艺，中外民俗‘J礼仪，东北财经大学出版社，2007，3(作者系海[1经济职业技术学院)

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